My mom unwrapped a Christmas gift of software, and then, my sister and I spent a few hours, with mom, installing and testing the product.

We laughed until we all had tears in our eyes…

Mom, not all that enthusiastic about “something new to learn”, wasn’t even certain HOW this new “thing” was going to add value to her life.  But, she graciously sat in front of the monitor, with the uncomfortable headset on, reading whatever we could find for her to read.

Hearing the words being repeated aloud four or five times…I was reminded of the story of the two wolves that live inside us…the bad wolf who is all about envy, pity, sadness and evil and the good wolf who is all about joy, happiness, playfulness and the like.  The one who gets stronger is the one we feed.   The passage about the two wolves is taped on the wall of mom’s work area, it’s a good one to read now and again…

The software loaded, mom having read about the wolves a few times, we were now ready to “train” the software to learn mom’s diction…how she says certain words, etc.   It was during this part of the process that the laughter ensued.   Mom would read, then read and respond to what the program had written, which would then result in her explanation being typed on the page…

rinse, repeat, rinse, repeat…

Mom’s explanation about her dental work was captured by the program as “metallic teeth”.   Hitler made his way onto the page, however his name had not once been mentioned by my mom…   There were some hilarious sexual references which appeared, although, not one of those passages was uttered by my mom…had I had the presence of mind to save the page to disk, I could relive the laughing till I cried, but, alas, I didn’t.

Suffice it to say, I do have a recommendation for depression.

Purchase a $40 version of your favorite brand of “naturally speaking” software and bring in an unwilling, tired and suspicious family member to the computer and force them to read written material that they really don’t want to read.   As everyone reads what the software types, watch as the laughter, and eventually, the tears, flow freely.

Throw out the Prozac!!!

Speak and “it” is written…you never know what the result will be!

Finally took some time to go sit in the dark and be entertained…saw “Up in the Air” and “Did you hear about the Morgans?” - the title of this post is from the first movie. A airline stewardess asks George Clooney’s character if he’d like the whole can by saying “Can, sir” such that it sounded like “Cancer?”  He had her repeat the phrase and when he still didn’t understand, then she slowly enunciated “Can, sir?”

Guess I’ve beat that scene and explanation to death…so, on to the topic at hand.

CANCER

Our Christmas plans were modified to accommodate a friend who is dying of colon cancer.  A friend of my sister’s  is also dying of colon cancer.  On Christmas day, I learned that the husband of another friend of mine actually died over the holidays…it appears he went happily…in his easy chair with a blanket on his lap and the TV remote in his hand.  The police officer summoned to the house, requested when the husband didn’t call his kids for Christmas day, said it looked like he didn’t suffer any pain, just went to sleep.  For that, my friend was indeed grateful.  No one knows when he died, the family had left the previous Friday for the chilly north.  It just wasn’t like him NOT to call the kids on Christmas.

There are all kinds of cancer.  The kind that doctors can find during routine tests.  The kind that shows up on your skin years after you spent hours baking in the sun.  And there is the non-standard kind, the cancer of the soul, the heart and mind.

There is the child raised as an only child, given the full attention of the family, expecting that same adoration as an adult and who can’t understand, even late into life, why “everyone is against me”.   Unable to see that the selfish demands to be heard, admired, and the like, are not something the rest of the world has the time, desire or ability to offer to any adult, not like they were offered to the child.   There is no one against this adult child, no one but the adult child who can’t accept that the world doesn’t revolve around oneself.

There is the child, raised to believe that the ills of the parent are the result of that child’s existence, who carries the burden of taking care of everyone but him or herself…rather than to be found “inconsiderate”.    Time spent on self  is thought to be selfish, instead of nourishment for the soul.

There is the child, more sensitive than many,  who carries, more than the rest, the pain of the domesticated and then abandoned animals of the world…left to fend for themselves, sometimes in fenced in areas where there is no access to water, or food…left to starve.

The Bible teaches us that this life, this painful, depressing existence, is the result of Adam and Eve not following God’s rule so very long ago.   No more easy living…instead strife, heartache and pain.   What a wonderful legacy to be passed down for eternity.

Better living through chemistry?   Trazadone cures the cancer of depression, for some folks.   As long as it is ingested, it tends to take away the dull ache of the “quiet desperation”  and allows the song to be heard, even if it is never released.

Others offer that Jesus, and the salvation he brings, is the path to a joyful life.  Ask any Christian, ANY Christian…from where I stand, Jesus is another form of “better living through chemistry”…allowing believers to be able to CHOOSE to have hope and faith in a “better tomorrow”.  While loved ones suffer and die anyway.

What a cheerful, upbeat, piece this is…guess it’s partly due to watching “Up in the air” today…or maybe it’s just rambling on about what goes on in the world every day…Tiger Woods, even with all the money and accolades, the wife and family…still unsatisfied.   Brittany Murphy…cabinet full of prescriptions.

Is it the “end times” that is the reason for the strife, or is this life just more of the same heartache and struggle that has been going on for as long as there has been written word talking about it?   We used to have clean water, unpolluted food chains, forests and wilderness where life abounded…and now…now, we have terrorists, pollution, poverty, sickness, etc.

Cancer.

We have cancer.

Are Your Friends Here for a Reason, a Season, or a Lifetime?

Anonymous

Many of us are fortunate enough to have friends who are a consistent part of our lives throughout all our ups and downs. However, sometimes others we consider friends appear to enter, then depart from our lives for reasons we try to, but don’t always, understand. This piece nicely explains the flow of people in and out of our lives.

It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. When you figure out which one it is, you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are! They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrongdoing on your part, or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered. And now it is time to move on.

Then people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They bring you an experience of peace, or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons: things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

I don’t know if Susan Nola ever had a path, but we are so far off of this current path that it isn’t even funny.

Actually, IT IS FUNNY.

A friend sent me the Desert Preparation article.  And, in divine order (?), I read it when I needed it.  Not when it arrived in my inbox, not 12 hours later, but when the time was right.  I actually skipped over it, not knowing what “Desert Preparation” was about…

Yesterday while shopping in Winn Dixie, I was surprised to hear a description of my car announced over the loud speaker…and a summons to come to the front of the store.  I arrived to find all kinds of excitement.

Seems my car decided to “go for a ride” and backed itself right out of the parking space.  One of the women, who helped get the car BACK into the space, told me that she was walking towards the car when it began to back up.  She decided it best to let this impatient person continue backing up…but then she noticed there was NO ONE in the vehicle.  And that’s when the highlight of my day occurred.  I found tree branches under the back tire, keeping the car securely in it’s place…and, having had one of another challenging days, the tears were already flowing as I arrived.

I unlocked the car and set the parking brake when I heard “are you alright?”.

“no”

I wasn’t.  And, the tears continued to flow.

It was then that I realized I was causing concern to everyone still watching this exciting adventure…and I got out of the car…walked to the back and said out loud, “I do this once in awhile to make new friends…”    Everyone laughed, I dried my tears and life began to return to normal for all involved.

I received words of encouragement from people who shared their own experiences about friends and family who have it “much worse” than I.  Prostate cancer, dementia, hip replacements…in comparison, I have an automobile rolling across a busy parking lot.

Guess it depends on where you are standing in this life.

OR…it depends on returning to “better living through chemistry”.

I saw a doctor today for a prescription for Trazadone.  One tiny pill every day should stop the crying over a rolling automobile in a busy parking lot…the fact that 3 of 10 starving horses had to be put down because someone neglected to take care of them…the fact that there are hundreds of lonely seniors sitting on the front porches of homes all over this country - some of them with Alzheimer’s and who still have enough of themselves remaining that they realize they know, but just can’t put their finger on what it was they had for lunch today…that hearing aids just don’t work like we hope they would, that the doctor can’t restore perfect hearing as much as he or she would like to do…

or, learning about a corrupted database while attempting to play hookie and catch a movie…

discovering the computer that has been fixed still doesn’t work and another trip is required because I don’t have time to take it apart and fix it myself…

having a senior, senior, citizen call multiple times a day declaring his love and that “you never have to work another day of your life”…all I have to do is get married.   Only a 25 year age difference.

knowing that there are weeks of works to finish, while enduring constant interruptions, responsibilities and “time off to play hookie” but no time to get any of it done even with a “to do” list and a plan…

receiving admonishment from a friend for not paying attention to database backups which stopped occurring back in August when I had just learned that I would be  facing bankruptcy, homelessness and the uncertainty that goes with that kind of lifestyle: further, this friend notified me today that he “won’t be continuing this relationship” because “you are 100% responsible for this mess”.  Guess he practices “flying with eagles” instead of “hanging around with turkeys”…People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

not to mention (but I am mentioning it), explaining, sometimes more than once a day, that “unless I win the lottery, nothing has changed” to the creditors calling asking “can you make a payment?”.   A college education, years of workplace experience, past years of therapy and anti-depressants, a nomadic existence for 2 years, more job applications submitted/rejected than I can count…

there is more, but like my new friends in the Winn-Dixie parking lot told me, “there are others who have it a lot worse”.

9 Days till Christmas 2009.

Do you know where your sanity is?

TGIF - Today God Is First - Volume 1
by Os Hillman
Tuesday, December 15 2009

Nor did I go up to Jerusalem to see those who were apostles before I was, but I went immediately into Arabia and later returned to Damascus. - Galatians 1:17

The apostle Paul tells us in the first chapter of Galatians some of the facts surrounding his own conversion. He tells us that he clearly understood the call Jesus placed on his life. He did not have to consult other men about this calling. But before he was released to begin his own mission, He went to Arabia for three years. Why did Paul have to go to Arabia for three years before he ever met another disciple of Jesus Christ?

The Scripture does not tell us plainly why Paul spent three years in Arabia. However, based upon many examples of God placing special calls on people’s lives, we know it often requires a time of separation between the old life and the new life. No doubt, Paul had plenty of time to consider what had taken place in his life and time to develop an intimate knowledge and relationship with the newfound Savior. His life was about to change dramatically.

So often, when God places a call on one of His children, it requires a separation between the old life and the new life. There is a time of being away from the old in order to prepare the heart for what is coming. It can be a painful and difficult separation. Joseph was separated from his family. Jacob was sent to live with his uncle Laban. Moses was sent to the desert.

When God began a deeper work in my own life, it required a separation from all I had known before. He removed all that I had placed confidence in up to that point. It was very painful and very scary since I was in my mid-40’s. In my mind, it was not the time to start life over. I had been making plans for early retirement. God had a different idea. He removed all my comforts and security in order to accomplish a much greater work than what I could see at the time. The picture is clear now. I understand why it was necessary, but I didn’t at the time.

Perhaps God has placed you in your own desert period. Perhaps you cannot make sense of the situation in which you find yourself. If you press into God during this time, He will reveal the purposes He has for you. The key is pressing into Him. Seek Him with a whole heart and He will be found. God may have a special calling and message He is building in your life right now. Trust in His love for you that He will fully complete the work He has started in you.